Two years ago around this time my wife gave me the most incredible news of my life, that she was pregnant and after nine years of marriage we would be expanding our family. I had spent the first nine years of marriage trying to talk my wife out of wanting kids. I would argue with her that our lives were perfect and we would lose all of our freedom. We were fortunate enough to be able to travel at the drop of a hat and experience the world but little did I know what experiencing the world truly meant.

During the pregnancy my wife was incredibly fortunate and had no complications or morning sickness. It was a very easy pregnancy by some standards, for which I was very thankful. I continued to drag her around the country trying to get in as much last minute travel as possible. It was still very surreal to me at this point. Looking back I think it was mostly fear that made the whole thing so hard to comprehend. I’m not sure if it was fear of having a child or fear of failing that child. I guess most people don’t go into parenthood with a lot of confidence and I certainly fell into that category.

We went through all the classes that the hospital required or recommended. In our first class about the basics of child birth everyone had to introduce themselves and when doing so one of the husbands actually asked “Why do the men have to be here?”. I feared for his life. He was in a room full of pregnant women and somehow had the nuts to ask this question. At that point I felt a little better for myself, hell, I certainly wasn’t as bad as that guy. I never questioned why I should be there…yet. One of our last classes was about breast feeding and it was in January. In my job I have to work during all possible inclement weather, even if it takes days to finish the job. I, of course, worked the two days prior to the class and had been up for around 30+ hours when we arrived. Sadly I made the gentleman from the previous class look like Ward Cleaver. In between fidgeting, huffing, shuffling and nearly falling asleep several times I was a complete ass and disrespected my wife and probably irritated everyone around me. While I complained about no sleep and having to go back to work in a few hours, I never stopped to think what my wife had been going through for seven months at that point. Looking back I am glad she didn’t run me over on the way to the parking lot.

Finally the day came my wife was scheduled to be induced and I was going to be a father. Now the nerves finally hit. I remember every second of that day. We watched American Idol while waiting for the little guy to arrive. Poor Ramiele was kicked off that night. Somewhere around 11:30 pm it was decided to do a C-section. The time was here. I remember dressing in scrubs and going into the room and seeing my wife there (no I didn’t look over the curtain) and within minutes the doctors were holding my son. I was stunned. I sat in the chair next to my wife as she asked me if he was okay because he wasn’t crying, he was. The nurses took him over to clean him and do the cord. and basically said “Hey get over here”. I looked down at him for the first time and he reached up and grabbed my finger. I don’t know how much he could see or what he was aware of but he seemed to be looking at me. From that second on I could not remember a moment without him.

Seventeen months later he has gone from and infant we carried everywhere to a mad man that helps push the cart through the store. We still travel but with a little more planning and more luggage of course. I guess my advice to people would be to wait, and enjoy life a little. I know I needed that time to grow and experience the world, which I think has made me a better father. Having a child is hard, takes work and is not for everyone but for those who do experience it is an amazing thing. There will be exhausting days and exhilarating ones, sleepless nights and ruined dinners but nothing can dampen the joy of seeing your child learn and grow. Every time my son comes and grabs my finger to drag me outside, I think back to the first time I saw him and how, I hope, someday he can experience that same joy I’ve felt since the day he was born. So thank you to my wife for being the best wife and mom ever…I’m biased.

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